November 16, 2006

  • Memories

    Spent a lot of time in quiet.  Lost in thought.  Angry.  Sad.  Defeated.


    Nobody fought harder than Steven to be healthy.  To stay strong.  To truly live.  Nobody.  He truly did LIVE.  I owe him that much.  Will BE that and all that and even more.  I do not even own a little white flag to wave.  Won't look on eBay to try and buy one either.  I realize how much all of that little stuff really does matter.  Really does matter.


    Did.


    I had a bit of a meltdown going down that old path again.  Remembering.  Laughing.  Crying.  Sheesh.  I'm still in a bit of a fog.  It seems so near.  Just there.  Just then.  Just......


    I found this quote in one of my old journals.  Steven sent it to me.  It mattered then.  Matters now.  Spoke directly to my soul.


    "The issue of whether there is a Greater Reality or not, for me at least, has been settled. I know that there is. So I will speak to you from the knowing that I possess and will not in any way equivocate or minimze my statements and my truth to fit nicely into the dualism of your human considerations." -Emmanuel

Comments (3)

  • Hugs and kisses.

  • Too many deep words in that quote for mitch to comprehend......... but glad you found some old words shared...... even if it hurt a little...

    And yah!!! What Cat said.............

  • Is nothing wrong with me just checking in right?

    right mitch........ ur a tard and can do that any day...........

    Just checking................

    Puts a mirror under ur nose...........

    .......................................................................................

    No need to smack me..... I said I was just checking................... grrrrrrr

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What?

I AM still paranoid,
though reasons changed.
I'm paranoid that they'll figure out the language
and patterns of
me,
and I'll forget to rea
r r
ange.

Then I'll just be textbook.